I noticed with some surprise, that today is my 30th day of running this blog. It marks one entire month passing (or at least, that is if I see time as a linear thing). It’s a little scary how time can carry you through life so swiftly, but I think of all the things that have happened, that I have learned in this month of blogging, and I shake off the sadness.
It’s not always like that in the passing of life – I am genuinely heavy-hearted in the comings and goings of the things that I enjoy, but this is different for me. Without going through these experiences, I wouldn’t be where I am. Thus, I see this as a success.
I’m not going to lie, it’s been bumpy. Obstacles make us who we are, but they hurt, and it’s always easier to run. And over 16,000 words on philosophy aren’t written themselves!
Possibly the biggest obstacle of blogging, and in fact writing/art in general is ourselves. As I always say, this society supports many, many things that just aren’t working, or are somehow neglectful of nature/natural ways of living. A perfect example is that now we as humans can and often do mistake thirst for hunger, and just eat whenever we feel like doing so. People are even eating out of boredom. Boredom. Thirst and hunger are possible the two most fundamental necessities of life, and now we can’t tell which is which.
In the world of art, though, these obstacles that we create for ourselves are more along the lines of having the tendency to place expectations and pressure upon ourselves to succeed. For what? Approval and pride, both of which are not things to look for. The former because approval should never be sought after, as true approval comes from those that accept who you are no matter what you accomplish. And the former, because pride is an ego-driven feeling, which is commonly mistaken for confidence, when in fact they are very different things (confidence comes from a trust and appreciation of one’s own ability, whilst pride is a “good feeling” based off material successes like winning a trophy).
As I wrote in my post on failure, expectations can never realistically always be achieved, and the more open-minded the mind, the less one is dependent on creating and completing expectations. The problem is, though, that we often cannot gauge our true capabilities in different circumstances, and thus apply unneeded pressure upon ourselves. This is why it makes perfect sense that so many people create a blog and are simply unable to maintain it. The invisible enemy that is ourselves is at work expecting things we cannot/do not care to achieve. Later on, this can cause anxiety in not completing what was expected (even if it was you that was doing the expecting).
So live without having to always win, win, win. Despite how difficult it may be for me to accept it, sometimes there will be days that I won’t be able post on this blog. Those days may feel like blemishes or gaps in a very impressive daily blog. But what I and everyone else should understand is that those days are not those things. Breaks are things we need as people, and often we do not value enough. Those are moments that allow me to return to my best.
Anyway, thank you to everyone, and I really want to express all my gratitude to all the support that I’ve received. Let there be many great months in the future!